Sexy Sihanoukville aka Sexville

Day 71 – 23rd May to Day 75 – 27th May

Sihanoukville is Cambodia’s version of a beach holiday resort, with its white sandy beaches, tropical islands and late night bars it’s easy to see why. Built in the 1950’s it was Cambodia’s first and only deep water port, designed to make them less reliant on Vietnam’s ports. It has now grown pretty large and is constantly ex-panding. The lure of the beautiful beaches and cheap beer (the Angkor brewery is just outside of town) at $0.50 brings the tourists flocking in, and in turn the working girls as well…hence the nickname sexville. We got a little lost coming into town but I’m happy we did otherwise we would never come across a very small airport. Which, according to the sign offers “Fashionable Disco Flights”, why would you ever get any other type of flight again?

Als bro, Nick, had recommended that we stay in the Monkey Republic where you can stay in your own bungalow only a short walk from the beach (or an even shorter drive I should add) for only $3.00 each. Perfect. Monkey Republic is a really cool guest house built mainly of bamboo with various levels here there and everywhere. It has a pool table, two movie rooms (if that’s your thing), a bar with a fine selection of cheap booze and great food.

We rolled in grabbed a super refreshing, super cheap Angkor beer. Dumped our stuff in the bungalow and headed straight down the beach and oh man, what a beach. White sands as far as the eye could see, crystal clear water, and even fun inflatable objects to play on in the water (yes I am a large child). The only downside was it was hot, really stonking hot, hence it was very important to always have cold Angkor nearby otherwise risk overheating.

There are four main beaches around Sihanoukville; Serendipity, Occheuteal, Independence and Sokha beach. Occheuteall beach is supposed to be the best all-rounder but Monkey Republic is closest to Serendipity beach so we spent most of our time there maxing and relaxing, or at least trying to. There are loads of kids running around getting up to all sorts of mischief. Namely shooting BB guns at us and for some reason group attacking one of the other English guys which was most entertaining. There are literally hundreds of locals trying to sell stuff to you. From lobsters and braclets to massages, haircuts and fireworks. Obviously we had to buy a few fireworks which turned out to be a mistake as someone fired one at me a burnt a perfect hole in my new t-shirt and back, highly entertaining for everyone but me of course.

The first night there we hooked up with three pretty cool English lads staying in the bungalow next to us. We had a few giraffe pitchers before heading down to the local bar on the beach JJ’s, a place they promised with endless fun. By gum they weren’t lying with local lads blowing fire and spinning fire sticks, good tunes (as good as you’re gonna get in Cambodia), a great location, and free shots and beer bongs whenever the bar staff thought the place needed living up bit.

One of the English guys was very horny so we thought it a good idea to feed him some Viagra one night. We got the chef at The Monkey Republic to lace his burger with it (what a hero), put some in his beer, mashed some into his Jaegermeister. By the end of the night I was just feeding them straight to him saying they were crazy Finnish stomach pills. We screwed him over good and proper. Then, the evil bastards that they are, turned on me. Fair play to them, they planned and executed it to perfection. They all went to possibly the best burger joint in Cambodia and laced yet another burger. Then Als and one of the dudes came back with delicious burgers and made me feel very envious. Soon after they arrived Rob turned up with a spare burger and offered it around. Being a sucker for a burger I wolfed it down and soon found myself in Viagra land…nuff said!

Whilst in Sihanoukville we also went to check out the Snake House, which house’s Cambodia’s largest collection of snakes and birds and a few crocodiles as well. There truly are some weird and wonderful snakes in the world and all of them give me the heebi jeebies, I am not a snake fan. There were crap loads crocodiles but we had just missed feeding time. Crocodiles don’t really do much unless there’s food around; they just lie around occasionally hissing at each other. Still it was cool seeing that many crocodiles close up. The snake house is well worth a trip if you’re in town.

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